


he is in love (true love)

by orphan_account



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Watcher Entertainment RPF
Genre: Fluff, M/M, ryan is very sleepy, shane is in loooove, shane is panicking over nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:54:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24579370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It's a long drive home and Shane has some realizing to do...Loosely based on Taylor Swift's song "You Are In Love" from her 1989 album. They never actually say (or think) I love you though, so idk.
Relationships: Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej
Comments: 18
Kudos: 118





	he is in love (true love)

**Author's Note:**

> The only one who beta'd this is Grammarly, but at least my grammar should be on point!
> 
> Shane overthinks a lot in this, which was kinda fun to write because he usually seems so cool and chill. Ryan is just a sleepy boi (I relate).

«Do you want to stop and get coffee?»

Shane blinked slowly and spared a glance over to the passenger seat, where Ryan was fiddling with a video camera.

«What?»

«Do you want to get a coffee? There’s still an hour and a half until we’re back, and I’m gonna be honest with you man, if you don’t get any caffeine in you soon, I don’t think we will survive the trip home.»

Shane let a chuckle pass his lips, which immediately morphed into a yawn. He nodded, getting Ryan’s point, and gave a thumbs up.

«Sure, I’ll stop at the next station,» Shane replied, knowing that Ryan was probably right. «But you gotta keep talking to me, or else we won’t even make it to the station.»

Okay, so maybe that was a little bit of an exaggeration, but driving was boring enough as it was. The least Ryan could do was talk to him.

«So what are your plans for tomorrow?»

Shane shrugged. «Sleeping, probably.»

Ryan nodded - Shane could vaguely see the moment in his peripheral - but didn’t say anything else. He didn’t have to, it turned out because the silence that followed was like someone had put an enchantment on them. Ryan didn’t say anything, Shane didn’t say anything, but somehow the silence spoke for them.

The silence said ‘ _you are my best friend_ ’.

It spoke ‘ _I’m always happy when I am with you_ ’.

Sang ‘ _Please always be with me_ ’.

Shane pulled off the highway without a sound when he saw a diner that was open 24 hours. As he turned the engine off, he was hit by a feeling of not knowing what was coming next. He was pretty sure he knew, because what else than getting coffee, coming home and crashing in his bed would he do? But it still felt like the night was young and with Ryan walking a little closer than normal to him, he could do anything. Be anything.

The diner was dimly lit and practically empty. When they walked in, a bell chimed from above them, and they were hit by a gust of warmth. They had walked in together, so now Ryan was pressed up to Shane’s frame, and he could feel the shiver.

He looked down at his friend, to see his lips tightly shut together and his arms wrapped around his chest. He hadn’t brought a jacket, still, in the thin white shirt, he wore in the car. Shane shrugged off his coat and wrapped it around Ryan without a word.

It was ridiculously big on him, which Shane found endearing and also something else. Something that tugged at his belly, made his breath hitch a little bit. He looked away from Ryan who was staring at him in confusion before he could see the warm flush spreading up his cheeks.

If he had looked a little longer, he might have noticed a similar flush spreading up Ryan’s neck, ending at the tips of his ears.

They found a booth more in the back, by the big floor to ceiling windows, and sat opposite each other. As a tall person, tables - and chairs and any place he had to sit in a public space really - was a nightmare for him. He sat with impeccable posture so that at least some of his thighs could rest on the bench, but his legs still tangled with Ryan’s under the table, all the way over on his side. It was normal, it was what happened every time, but Shane still couldn’t help how all his attention suddenly turned to the warmth and the pressure of Ryan’s calf pressed against his.

A young girl who looked like she was only at the start of her twenties came over to them with a pen and a notebook. Shane hadn’t even looked at the menus, mostly because he was too busy situation himself in the seat so that he could be a little bit comfortable, but he knew what he wanted anyway.

«Hello, I’m Nancy and I’ll be your waiter tonight. What do you want?»

Shane looked over at Ryan to see what he thought. The plan was coffee, but sitting here with Ryan, their feet tangled together, the lights from the street hitting the side of Ryan’s face in a way that made him look close to an angel, Shane kind of wanted to not leave for a while.

For a brief second, Shane and Ryan locked eyes and there was something there. A glimmer in Ryan’s eyes that said ‘ _let’s not leave. Let’s run away with each other and see where life leads us_ ’. A kind of adventurous glint that Shane usually only saw in Ryan in the late hours of a Supernatural shoot, sleep-deprived and a little scared.

It hit Shane like a train in the middle of his chest. The urge to reach over, to brush his knuckled over Ryan’s undoubtedly soft cheeks, to lean over and brush his lips against Ryan’s, to entangle their hands above the table like two teenagers.

It hit Shane so hard, he didn’t even realize that Ryan looked away and gave his order to Nancy, and now they were both waiting for him to speak.

He ignored the flush creeping up his neck and cleared his throat. «Uhm, the same as him.»

Nancy gave him a smile, nodded, and wrote something down in her notepad. Then she turned to leave, but not before she managed to wink Shane’s way like she was in on some joke, and now he was really blushing.

«Long night?» Ryan asked as Shane tried to figure out what the hell had just happened.

«Yeah, you could say…» Shane trailed off, because Ryan was leaning forwards and even though Shane’s coat was way too big in length on Ryan, it wasn’t in width, and with the way Ryan was leaning on his arms, the arms were really bulging with muscles.

«I feel you, man. This day feels like it has lasted a week.»

Shane wanted to protest, to be sappy and say that time felt meaningless when he was with Ryan, that he cherished every moment with him, and not saying it almost physically hurt him. He did manage to nod and hum though, so that was something.

Truth be told, Shane wasn’t really sure why it was hitting so hard right now. In his head, Ryan’s Unsolved voice proposed several theories, ranging from delirium caused by lack of sleep to ghosts possessing him.

They sat in comfortable silence until some other girl came out with their coffees. Shane clutched the white mug immediately but kept his eyes on Ryan whose eyes widened and started to sip eagerly. Then he started to cough and turn red, and Shane reached worriedly over to Ryan, trying to pat him on his back but failing.

He eventually calmed down, taking in deep, shuddering breaths and closing his eyes.

«You’re not falling asleep here, are you?» Shane joked, a hint of worry still lingering in his voice.

Ryan chuckled with his eyes still closed, winced, and then shook his head. His cheeks, red like cherries, were glistening with tears.

«Just resting from my brush with death.»

Ryan’s voice had no business being so rough and deep. It was the kind that went straight to the deeper parts of Shane’s belly, and to cover up the rush of feelings that were let out through his lips in the form of a chuckle, he coughed.

Ryan finally opened his eyes again, a little red but seemingly happy and content, a big grin on his face.

«At least it woke me up. Don’t need the coffee anymore.»

Shane chuckled again and took a sip from his own coffee. It was a bit colder now, so it didn’t burn him, but it was still warm and when he cradled the cup against his chest - not bothered to put it down on table knowing he was going to keep drinking it - it caused a warm spot right about where his heart was located.

The food came out next. Burgers and fries, except that there was only one container with fries. They had forgotten Shane’s.

«Uhm, excuse me, we ordered two fries, not one,» Ryan informed the waiter.

He looked confused down at the order on the tray and back up again. «Are you sure, because here it says one fries?»

Ryan scrunched his eyebrows, then it seemed like he realized something and brushed him off. «It’s okay, we’ll share. I don’t think I’ll eat very much anyway.»

Shane, who had never known Ryan to eat ‘not very much’, raised a single eyebrow at Ryan, who seemed a little nervous.

Ryan refused to meet his eyes, and Shane wondered if he had done something wrong. Maybe Ryan had some eating problems? Maybe this was a sore spot for him, and Shane had just gone up and prodded at it with metal tweezers.

But then Ryan was looking at him again, and he was beaming and he seemed to fill the whole diner with the brightness of it, and Shane wanted nothing more than to bask in the warmth, so he pushed those thoughts aside. If he saw something else, he would bring it up for Ryan.

He started to work on the burger, but it was ridiculously large, even for Shane, and he ended up with sauce dribbling down his chin.

Ryan let out a loud laugh as he saw the mess, pointing at him. «Dude, you have sauce on your entire chin!»

Shane thought that if he would get this reaction from Ryan - all bright-eyes and white smile - he would have to make a mess of himself more often.

When he had grabbed one of the napkins and tried to wipe it off, he turned questioning eyes to Ryan, raising his eyes in a silent question.

Ryan laughed again and shook his head. «No, you missed a spot - right there - just - here, just let me do it,» he grinned and leaned over the table, grabbing a napkin and wiping at Shane’s mouth and chin, his eyes never leaving Shane’s.

He had to pretend that it didn’t do things to him - the type of things that only past girlfriends had done to him, the type of things that made him want to do a lot more than friendship-things with Ryan.

«Slob,» Ryan muttered softly, casting his eyes down on Shane’s lips - no, chin - before he looked up again. «There, all done.»

Somewhere along the way, Shane’s heart had sped up, and now his temperature was rising and he felt minutely aware of his own skin and everything it was touching. Ryan sat back and crumpled up the napkin in his hand before throwing it on his finished plate.

Shane found himself wondering when he had started to look at Ryan like he was the only one in the world.

They finished up, paid, and then they walked out into the chilly air. In the corner of his eye, he could see Ryan tug Shane’s coat tighter around himself. It was kind of adorable, how sensitive Ryan was even to a little cold. He had a sudden urge to wrap his arm around Ryan’s shoulder and pull him closer, heating him up with his own body warmth. To prevent himself from doing it, he pushed his hands deeper into his pant-pockets, something he almost never did.

When they started to drive, Shane noticed how Ryan yawned, and blinked, and sat very restlessly in his seat trying to stay awake.

«If you want, you can crash at my place,» Shane offered as Ryan yawned again. «It’s closer.»

Ryan nodded and hummed a little bit, letting his headrest on the window and closing his eyes. His breath evened out, and he was asleep.

Shane didn’t wake him until they parked outside of Shane’s apartment, and when Ryan squinted up at Shane with bleary eyes, he almost wished he hadn’t.

«Too tired to walk - carry me?»

His voice was so soft and low, Shane wasn’t sure he heard him right.

«What?» He asked, squatting down so he was closer to Ryan’s face.

Ryan blinked slowly, almost falling asleep again, and reached out both his arms. «Carry me,» he sighed.

Shane couldn’t help the chuckle leaving his lips. «Okay, little guy. Let me just…» he reached in and clicked off his seatbelt, then he turned around. «Hop on.»

Moments later he could feel Ryan’s warm body pressed up against his, his thighs straddling Shane’s waist and his arms hanging loose around Shane’s neck. Ryan, although small, was heavy, and Shane was scared he was going to pull a muscle lifting him up, but he handled it surprisingly well, only letting a tiny groan leave his mouth. Ryan muttered something into his neck, his lips so close he could almost feel them on his neck, and Shane shuddered.

Trying not to think about how he could feel Ryan everywhere on him, he closed the door to Ryan’s car shut and locked himself into his apartment, heading straight to his bedroom to lay Ryan down there. He could take the too-small couch for one night if that meant Ryan would have a good night’s sleep.

Ryan cuddled into his pillows and comforter as soon as he hit it, automatically scooching over to the left side.

«Sleep well,» Shane mumbled, thinking Ryan was too far gone into dreamland to respond.

«Shane,» Ryan sighed, his eyes closed, and Shane could feel his entire stomach flip. «Don’t leave,» he muttered when Shane started for the door.

When he looked back, Ryan’s eyes were open, although they were glossed over with sleep.

«Ryan.»

He wasn’t sure what to say, because he desperately wanted to not leave Ryan, but he also didn’t want to do something Ryan wasn’t comfortable with. He opted for a middle way out.

«I have to lock the door.»

Ryan nodded but didn’t close his eyes. «But come back to bed, okay? Don’t leave me.»

Shane had never heard Ryan so soft and vulnerable and was shocked by the sudden urge to cuddle him in and never let anyone or anything hurt him ever again.

«Okay, I just have to lock the door,» he repeated, and he knew he shouldn’t because consent did not count if one of the parties were possibly talking in their sleep, but Ryan also seemed really distressed at the idea of Shane leaving and he thought that there must have been some part of him that wanted Shane close to him.

Ryan closed his eyes, and Shane went out to lock up the door and turn off the lights and get some space to think. He played out the scene that just happened in his head, but this time Ryan was completely awake. Ryan didn’t ask Shane to stay, and Shane didn’t entertain the idea.

Okay, so awake-Ryan would never ask that, and so Shane shouldn’t go back, right?

He was getting himself a glass of water, not really tired yet, when he heard the door down the hall to his bedroom creak open, and then some soft thudding as Ryan walked.

«Shane?» Ryan asked when he came into the kitchen.

He had gotten out of his clothes and was now in some boxers and one of Shane’s softest T-shirts. Heat crept up Shane’s back.

«Stop thinking so much, come to bed with me,» Ryan muttered, and grabbed Shane’s hand as he was trying to process.

‘Stop thinking so much’ was rich coming from Ryan, who was the world’s biggest over-thinker. Also, Ryan’s hand was soft in Shane’s hand and warm, and there was too much happening all at once both inside himself and outside for Shane to possibly notice it all. When had his hands started to sweat?

He was in the bedroom now, being led straight to the bed by Ryan. When they got to the edge of it, Ryan stopped and turned around. He still had that sleepy look on his face, but he also looked determined now. Before Shane knew what was happening, Ryan reached out his hands to the button on Shane’s pants and was taking it off.

Shane sucked in a breath and tried not to think about Ryan barely touching him in a very sensitive place because this was very clearly not sexual in any way. As soon as he had stepped out of his pants, Ryan started to unbutton his flannel way faster and less clumsy than Shane had ever been able to. A couple of seconds later it was off, and Ryan took Shane’s hand again and crept into bed, tugging a little at where his hand was linked with Shane’s.

Shane, dumbfounded and feeling a lot of emotions he usually didn’t feel, crept in beside him and Ryan immediately snuggled into Shane’s side, which made him feel hot all over.

«Ryan,» Shane asked, not really wanting to end this but needing to know that this was what Ryan actually wanted.

«Shh, we’ll talk tomorrow. Just sleep,» Ryan muttered into his chest, and Shane could feel the last of his resolve melt away.

Obviously, Ryan wanted this right now, and Shane wanted it, so why not just let it happen?

Putting his arm around Ryan who had slung his thigh over Shane’s stomach and was basically koala-ing him, he snuggled into the warmth and soon succumbed to the darkness that was sleep.

-

When he woke up, it was with Ryan’s head on his chest. Shane barely ever fell asleep on his back, so it was strange to wake up and the first thing he saw was the ceiling, but he didn’t mind it.

«Morning big guy,» Ryan muttered, and Shane’s eyes snapped down to see Ryan staring at him.

He wasn’t really sure what to say, and he was very worried about his morning breath the close proximity to Ryan’s face, so he just smiled.

Ryan snorted and patted Shane’s chest, burying his face down in it again.

Shane couldn’t bring himself to start talking, afraid Ryan would suddenly realize what he was doing and no-homo his way out of it. Shane wasn’t sure he would be able to deal with that right now, so he stayed quiet and kept his eyes on Ryan, taking in the way his hair was messy and sticking up in tufts, and how his shoulder was peeking through the T-shirt he was wearing and how his thigh was exposed and crossed over Shane’s own leg.

«You’re staring,» Ryan pointed out without looking up, which made the vibrations of his voice tickle his chest.

«No, I’m not.»

Ryan looked up, a scowl on his face. «Are too.»

Shane chuckled and pointedly looked away from Ryan.

«I didn’t say I didn’t like it,» Ryan whispered, and suddenly his hand was on Shane’s jaw, leading his gaze back to his face. Where his hands gripped Shane’s jaw, he could feel electric currents that made his whole body go slack.

«Ryan,» Shane whispered, his face close enough that he could see every detail of Ryan’s eyes.

The dark mocha color, with the little stripe of gold right under his right eye, and the lighter brown specks breaking it up a little bit.

He could almost feel Ryan’s breath on his lips, and he noticed how Ryan looked down at Shane’s lips the way Shane very often did before instigating a kiss.

Again, Shane worried about his morning breath, and without really wanting to he broke away from Ryan.

«I have to go brush my teeth!» he stumbled out, entangling him from Ryan’s limb and darting to the bathroom, hearing Ryan’s low chuckle behind him.

He brushed his teeth in a daze, his mind splaying out what had just happened for him again and again. He wasn’t really sure what was happening. Ryan had seemingly done a 180° yesterday, and now they were in uncharted territories of this friendship, and Shane really didn’t know what was coming next.

«Do you have a toothbrush for me too?»

Shane jumped, which he knew he would get shit for later, and twirled around in a rather un-gracious way to see Ryan leaning against the doorframe.

His arms were crossed over his chest, and the T-shirt rode up a little bit so Shane could see just a sliver of skin above his hipbones and it really was stupid the way his stomach coiled into a hot ball as if he had never seen Ryan without a shirt before.

«You’re staring again.»

Shane blinked and saw Ryan had moved closer to him, his hands down to his side again.

«Right. Toothbrush.»

He opened his drawers not really thinking about what he was looking for and stared into the drawer as if it had all the answers he was looking for.

«Okay, you need to get some coffee in you. I’ll look for it and meet you in the kitchen, okay?» Ryan asked, sneaking an arm around Shane’s waist.

Shane sighed and nodded, and Ryan stood up on his tippy-toes and kissed Shane’s cheek before promptly pushing him in the direction of the door.

Shane got to the kitchen before his mind caught up on what had happened, and he gingerly touched his face where Ryan's lips had been, feeling it hot and tingly.

The smell of coffee that came from the pot he made did help wake him up a little bit, but what really helped was the space so that he could process what was happening in peace. Ryan must have known he needed it because he spent a lot longer brushing his teeth than what would be considered normal.

Shane kind of felt like he had been running too fast for his legs to keep up. Like he had to just keep running to not fall, and now he had finally caught up.

When Ryan came in, he was prepared. He had even started on breakfast for Ryan - just a piece of toast that he had popped into the toaster - and he had his coffee mug in his hands.

When Ryan came in to hug him, he didn’t tense up or hesitate to wrap his arms around Ryan.

«You okay now?» Ryan asked into his chest, and Shane buried his face in Ryan’s hair.

«Yeah, I’m all caught up,» he muttered and placed a kiss on the top of his head.

Ryan looked up, a smile on his face. «So can I kiss you now, or do you have to brush your teeth again?»

Shane answered by placing his lips on Ryan’s, effectively shutting him up.

«I’m fine,» he muttered against his lips.

Ryan chuckled.

-

Later, when Shane had Ryan in his arms and it was the middle of the night, Shane asked what had made Ryan turn around like that. Ryan looked at him with fondness as he answered.

«Because you dribbled hamburger sauce down your chin and I realized that my best friend whom I was in love with also was an idiot, so I had to do something.»

Shane just kissed him.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, it's very late and I want (read: need) to sleep but the people living above us are having a party so that's literally impossible. So I decided to post this even though I didn't want to originally! 
> 
> There were a couple of things I was going to do in this that I ended up not doing, like for example have Shane realize and, y'know, utter the thought "I love him". Also, in the diner scene, I was setting up for them to reach into the bowl of fries at the same time so that their hands touched, but then that didn't happen so now the waiter just seems weird, but you know what? That's what happens in real life. You try your best to help someone and then it doesn't work out.
> 
> Anyways, I'm tired. If you liked it, consider giving a kudos, or maybe even comment if you really liked it! And if you didn't, well, I'm sorry for wasting your time. Hope you find something else you enjoy!


End file.
